Some unofficial Magic cards

Lands

• Caio
• Land
• (T): Add 1 to your mana pool.
  (T): Give +1/+2 to target student until end of turn.
• Savo
• Land
• (T): Add G to your mana pool.
  1(T): Add W to your mana pool.
• Orcish nuclear powerplant
• Land
• (T): Add R to your mana pool.
  X(T): Add X red mana to your mana pool.
  (T): Sacrifice Orchish nuclear power plant to add RRRRR to your mana pool.
• During your upkeep sacrifice a creature or Orcish nuclear power plant deals you 1 damage.
• This was one of the most powerful yet dangerous invention Urza ever made.

Artifacts

• Bottle of confusion
• 4
• Artifact
• (T)6: Target player's next turn is skipped. That player may counter this effect by paying 3 life. Bury Bottle of confusion at the end of turn.
• I'd rather run a marathon than face two mornings like this in a row.
  - Ilkka Känsälä, funny when too drunk
• Glasses of Make
• 1
• Artifact
• (T): Look one card at target player's hand at random.
• Sometimes even blind man can see.
  - Nisp, elvish hermit

Black

• Lipasti
• 2BB
• Summon Lipasti
• During your upkeep put a booze counter on Lipasti.
  0: Remove 3 booze counters from Lipasti to give it trample and +2/+2 until end of turn. If you remove any booze counters from Lipasti, it doesn't untap during your next untap phase.
• We thought it had eventually passed out, but it raised time and time again, even more powerful than before.
  - Kartan, Dwarven bartender
• 2/3
• Universal explosion
• 5BBBBB
• Sorcery
• Bury all players.
• Everything, a mice, a man, a giant, a god, a universe must each once come to an end. Nothing is eternal, except my hatred.
  - Kryodin, Sandurian war god
• Unholy Magic trader
• 1G
• Summon nerd
• During one's beginning with Magic these notorious card bandits are the greatest threat. They are forever seeking newbies to cheat rares from.
• 1/1

Red

• Server shutdown
• 2RR
• Enchanment
• Nerds do not untap during their controller's untap phase.
• It was the worst moment of my life, sitting there helpless watching the system go down.
  - Kemppi, Ouluian mud addict
• Net lag
• XR
• Instant
• Tap X nerds.
• Just a few seconds anymore, just a few seconds, please! I've already got 97%.
  - Harri, Ouluian ftp hero
• Engineer student
• 2R
• Summon engineer student
• Banding, first strike.
  Protection from artifacts.
  1R(T): Counter target artifact's effect.
• These intelligent, beautiful people were greatly appriciated in all Kjeldoran cities and by Urza himself.
• 2/4

Green

• The 1st of May
• 2GG
• Instant
• Untap all creatures.
  All students get +2/+2 and until end of turn.
  All engineer students get +4/+3, trample and flying until end of turn.
  In the end of turn remove Ilkka Känsälä from the game.
• Good Lord! Is this really happening or is this only a hallusination?
  - David Smith, English exchange student
• Biology student
• 2G
• Summon student
• Gets +*/+* where * is the number of forests you control.
  Gets +2/+2 if blocking or blocked Orcish lumberjacks.
• 1/1

Blue

• Exam day
• U2
• Instant
• Tap all students in play. All students get -1/-1 until end of turn.
• Oh no, I've still got 200 pages to go!
• Algebra assistent
• 2U
• Summon assistent
• (T)1: Tap target student.
• We have suffered, and so will everybody after us.
• 1/1
• Computing professor
• 3UU
• Summon professor
• Can not be blocked by students.
  (T): Give target assistent +1/+1 until end of turn.
• My words are much more valuable than yours.
  - Lappalainen, Ouluian computing professor
• 4/4
• Russian nuclear submarine
• 2U
• Summon submarine
• Islandwalk
  Cannot attack if defending player controls no islands. If at any time you control no islands, bury Russian nuclear submarine.
  If Russian nuclear submarine damages a player, that player gets 4 poison counters. If a player gets 10 poison counters he loses the game.
  During your upkeep sacrifice a creature or Russian nuclear submarine deals you 1 poison counter.
• Njet, njet, Vladimir!!! Not that button, you moran!!!
  - Vasili Tsenkovitch, Russian submarine captain
• 2/2

White

• Net addict
• 1W
• Summon nerd
• Bands with other nerds.
• 48 hour sessions are worth any sacrifice.
  - Netti-Miika, Ouluian net surfer
• 1/2
• Declare of Victory
• 5WWWW
• Interrupt
• Target player wins immediately. This spell can be countered only if all other players apart from the caster of this spell pay 30 life.
• Magic is only a card game. Get a life, all of you!
  

Golden